Lincoln's Birth Story

Lincoln's due date was October 1st and the entire pregnancy I positive that I was going to have the baby early. 

Oh how wrong I was.

My entire pregnancy I was told that I could not be induced because of my prior C-section. If I did not go into labor on my own before 41 weeks, it was an immediate C-section. I was told at one point they could break my water and see if that would put me into labor but that was very back and forth. 

So obviously as my due date approached I really started to make sure I was doing everything I could to go into labor. Curb walking, eating dates, stretches, bouncing on my yoga ball, etc. I was 2 weeks out and I had my membranes stripped (I was really trying everything!) and the doctor said that baby was still high.  The doctor told me that I needed to schedule my C-section and they had someone call me later that day. I did not answer that call. My entire pregnancy I had been positive and hopeful but that news sent me spiraling. That following week was so hard for me mentally. Soon after that doctor appointment I heard about the Miles Circuit which is meant to naturally induce labor and lower the baby. I did it for a week and a half and a couple of times I felt contractions and could time them but they never progressed. 

I went to my last doctor appointment and luckily I had dilated even more and the doctor I was assigned to that day was literally a miracle. He actually took time to listen to me and he told me that I could be induced with pitocin. A huge relief came over me and we scheduled my possible induction for the following Friday when I would be 40 weeks + 6 days. But I was still planning on doing everything I could do naturally induce labor. I continued to do the Miles Circuit and everything else. On Wednesday morning I woke up with cramping which kept me up for 2 hours but it died down and nothing more for the rest of the day. But let me tell you, the stress of going into labor was significantly lowered. Thursday afternoon the hospital called me and we officially scheduled my induction for the next morning. 

Friday morning came dark and early. When I got set up in my room they told me that they were going to try and break my water first and see if that would put me into labor and watch over the next 3-4 hours and then re-evaluate. I was dilated to a 4 and they broke my water 8:45am and contractions followed pretty soon afterwards which I took as a really good sign. I lasted an hour before asking for an epidural. At 10:40 they could see my contractions had slowed (because of the epidural). I had dilated to a 5 and they started the first round of pitocin which they increased by 2 degrees every 30 minutes. 

About an hour later they checked on me again and I was still a 5. They got a peanut ball for me to use. The baby was moving around a lot, but he wasn't dropping low enough. I started to get worried. If those things didn't improve in a certain amount of time would that result in a C-section? 

The doctor came in 40 minutes later and wanted to use a tool to see how strong/effective my contractions were being. Well, the peanut ball worked because he never even used the tool. I was totally dilated to a 10! We were all in complete shock! How did I go from a 5 to a 10 in less than an hour? Miracles are real! However, the baby's head was turned a little to the right- just like Hudson was (and why I needed a C-section). 

The nurses had me lie on my left side to get baby in a better position and then switched me to my right. I was on that side for less than 5 minutes when they immediately switched me back to my left side because baby's heart rate started to instantly drop when I was on my right. ARE YOU KIDDDING ME?! That is exactly what happened with Hudson when I was in labor with him. I could not lie on my right side because his heart rate would also drop. It was slightly funny at the similarities between the two. The nurses said my uterus must be in a certain shape for these things to happen during both of my pregnancies. I was somewhat freaking out but at the same time I felt calm. I just felt it was going to work this time. To have baby's heart rate go up the nurses had me drink juice and slushies. Generally I prefer water, but I started to down any sugar drink I could to make sure the heart rate stayed in a comfortable spot.

I had two nurses instead of one which I think was a small miracle. They were patient and willing to try different things instead of having it be "go time." At 1:43 they had me start practice pushes and they asked if I was ready to do start pushing. Only if baby was! I started to push and my progress was minimal. Only millimeters of progress. And apparently I have a very prominent pubic bone and it was making it tricky for the baby to get past that. The nurses had me take a break for me to catch my break and to hopefully have baby lower more. During my break I could feel the epidural start to wear off. I didn't push the button for more because I was hoping that not using more would help the baby progress more. 

The contractions got stronger and eventually I pushed the button.  I waited and nothing. I pushed it two more times spaced out and they just felt worse. The nurses came in to check on me and I told them and after speaking with the anesthesiologist I needed to wait a few more minutes and then they could up my dose. When it was time to up my dose and could push the button they also wanted me to start pushing again. I asked what they would suggest and they said try without the higher dosage. We started again at 3:35 and they said my pushing became much more effective because I could feel it and the pain wasn’t so bad because it had somewhere to go instead of just sitting and feeling all the pressure. But still thankful for that epidural because without it the pain would have been much worse. I am 100% an epidural kind of gal!

At 4:09 the head was crowning and I was able to touch his head. One of the nurses ran to get the doctor and the doctor said he would be there in 3 minutes. All these nurses came in and three minutes passed and no doctor. They were asking where he was and looking for him. They were all telling me not to push and I wasn't, but I could feel the baby coming with every contraction. The head nurse showed up and told me that we were not waiting for the doctor anymore and we were going to push the baby out. I didn't do much pushing and as soon as he was out they placed him on my chest. I was so shocked to think that I had actually done it! I just had a successful VBAC and I was holding my baby as they were clearing out his airways. I could not believe it. That was my only wish with Hudson-- to hold him right after he was born but the C-section prevented that. I was so desperate to have it this time and I still can't believe it happened. It was so beautiful to have our baby boy here. Andrew was able to cut the cord. The doctor came soon afterwards and I pressed that more epidural button so he could stitch me up- and I didn't feel anything at all. Like I said-- 100% an epidural gal. I had a 2nd degree tear and was very swollen but I would do it all again! 

Our sweet Lincoln Garrett

4:16pm, 7lbs & 5 oz, 21 in long

I loved giving birth in the form of a VBAC. I felt so much more connected and part of our baby's entrance to this world. With my C-section I was more loopy with the extra drugs so when Hudson was born I felt very tired and not fully present. I remember his birth but I don't feel that I was an active participant. From that day, I knew I wanted to try for a VBAC. I am still in shock. 

I tried to do everything I could to prepare my body to be strong enough for delivery. After Hudson was born I got back into my normal exercising routine (but a little less so because a baby/toddler make it a whole lot harder). Then when I hit 2nd trimester I started to use the WILMA App's Pregnancy Guide (100% recommend! They were tough and I was sweating through most workouts!) I wanted to make sure I was doing everything I could. Occasionally my prayers would be asking for a VBAC but once I found out I was pregnant, I prayed for a VBAC everyday. Miracles came large and small and I am so grateful. 

If I needed another C-section I would have been disappointed because I wanted to experience an opportunity I missed out on. After 2 C-sections, it's rare to be candidate for a VBAC. So my 2nd birth was my last shot. But if I had to have had one I would have been ok because the top thing on my list is a healthy baby. 

Healing this time round is a lot harder than my C-section which really surprised me. After my C-section I could walk and my pain was minimal. Maybe I just had a good C-section? But this time it's much harder to walk and I feel much more uncomfortable.  

Hudson came to visit everyday while we were in the hospital. He was a little unsure at first but he warmed up really quickly and has been so sweet with his brother. He always wants to see him and sometimes I hear him calling in his little 2 year old voice, "Baby Lincoln, where are you?" He likes to cuddle with him and wants to make sure he is ok. It amazes me that toddlers can just instantly love a new human that comes in and starts living with them even though it is a dynamic that they can't fully understand yet. 

It's still a little weird that we are a family of 4! Andrew is currently on paternity leave (love, love, love!) so it will be more real when he goes back to work. But right now we are loving taking is slow and adjusting to our new normal. There is nothing more perfect in the world than having a baby straight from heaven. 

Hudson's Birth Story

I was 40 weeks and 2 days when I delivered which is funny because a month before I delivered the doctor said that I was most likely going to have this baby early because I was progressing faster than usual for a first time mom.
But no such luck. 

On Tuesday Andrew and I went to my doctor's appointment and the doctor said I should be induced before the baby got any bigger and I hadn't made any new progress in weeks. We asked him what timeline he would recommend and he immediately said, "tonight," which is not what we were expecting. We were thinking maybe a few more days at least but he said the hospital might be booked for the night so it was a slim chance I would get in. He called the hospital wanting to know the earliest I could come and they said I could come that night. We talked about the benefits and the risks and the risks for the baby and for a C-section were going to go higher the longer I waited. 

Andrew and I were suddenly on a tight timeline that we had not planned on. We had just gotten the keys to our house the day before and we were planning on moving everything in on Tuesday (that day). We didn't tell anyone what the doctor said but just kept moving our stuff. The one thing I wanted done was to have our bed setup because I did not want to come home with a brand new baby and no bed. And we did manage to put that together. Thank goodness! 

Once we were alone in our house I asked Andrew to give me a blessing. Looking back at all that happened, everything that was said in the blessing was inspired. I truly believe that everything that was said is what helped me get our sweet baby to earth. 

I delivered at Utah Valley hospital and I cannot say enough good things about them! All the staff were amazing and so helpful! It was also a little special because both Andrew and I were born there. The actual building were we were born has been demolished, but it still makes me a little happy that we all were born at the same place. We got the call to be at the hospital at 6:30, but arrived there closer to 7:00, oops.  We went up to the 4th floor, Labor and Delivery and were admitted! 

Once we were in the hospital and I was all dressed down and ready to go, they hooked me up to all the things and started me on a drug called cytotec at 9:00 which helps the cervix dilate. They said I would start with 2-3 doses and then start pitocin which would start contractions. 

An hour or two in I started to feel some sharp cramping every few minutes. Not unbearable but 100% uncomfortable. Soon the cramping started to amp up and I had to stop what I was doing as I waited for it to pass or get into a more comfortable position. I had brought movies and games for Andrew and I to play because I had heard that sometimes it's a slow process just waiting. That was not our case at all and we never pulled out anything for entertainment once! 

And quick side note: Andrew was seriously the biggest help. He was trying his very best to help me through the pain I was experiencing and doing anything he could to help ease it. He was so patient with me and was there to do anything I asked. 

I was walking around the room trying to get comfortable when the nurse came in for the first checkup to see how I was progressing after that first round of cytotec. At that moment I was having a hard time getting myself to sit on the bed. The nurse looked at the monitor and she was seeing me struggle she said that she would check on me in a hour because it seemed I was progressing well and if my progress kept going after an hour I would start the pitocin. We were all rejoicing in my pain which is the strangest thing ever but in this case it meant progress! 

This may seem odd, but at the time while I was having all this pain (aka contractions), I did not realize I was in active labor because I was thinking that would start when I started the pitocin. But no, I was very much in labor. Around 12:45am I was sitting down having a contraction, as soon as it was over I stood up to move and 5 seconds later I had another contraction and right there my water broke. People say that when your water breaks it's usually slow and never a big thing like they make it out to be in the movies. Well, mine was straight from a movie. Andrew ran out to the hall to tell the nurses my water broke and to tell them I was done and needed an epidural. I think that's when it hit me that I was in labor. I only needed one dose of cytotec and I never even needed the pitocin.

As soon as Andrew told them there were several nurses who came in as well as the anesthesiologist
 (who was just about to go off shift). They helped me over to the bed and helped me lie still to get the epidural. The epidural stung a little but that stinging pain was nothing to contractions. When that epidural kicked in I was in heaven! 

I was having constant contractions- one on top of another (and I did not feel one single thing!), and it was not giving the baby time to rest in between. They compared it to being dunked in a pool with only a few seconds rest in between to catch your breath. He was distressed so they gave me a drug to help slow my contractions. Once the drug kicked in, our baby started doing much better.

They kept checking me through the night and I kept progressing. At one point the nurse said that my uterus loved being in labor because it kept putting out strong contractions. Andrew and I both tried to get some sleep but I think the most we both got was 30 minutes near the end. Through the night while I was lying there I just prayed a prayer of gratitude for everything that had happened in the past few hours (especially for that epidural). 

Around 7:30 I was at a 9.5 and they gave me a peanut ball to put between my legs to get to a 10 faster. Sure enough it worked and I was ready to start pushing. The doctor said he could tell baby was head down but could not tell his head position, but would soon be able to tell once I started pushing.  Shortly before 9:00am is when I started pushing and the doctor was able to tell that his head was turned sideways which made it more difficult for him to come out. I pushed, no progress. His head was stuck. The doctor told me my options.

1. We could try a vacuum but I was more likely to tear or
2. Go to a C-section. 

A C-section was the last thing I wanted so we opted to try the vacuum first. Andrew and I prayed that the vacuum would work and/or the baby would turn his head. After pushing for an hour with no progress and having the baby's heart rate go down with every push we had to go to option 2, and I needed a C-section. 

The next moments really are a blur. Everything happened so fast and they must have given me some drugs because I was so out of it. From what I do know is they gave me more stuff to numb me up, quickly took me to the operating room, asked me if I could feel anything, and then a few moments later he was born. Andrew was by me the entire time and as soon as he saw our baby he said, "He's out!" From the time they announced I needed a C-section to him being born it took maybe 15 minutes. The nurses had Andrew follow them with our new baby as I stayed there (obviously). Andrew brought our sweet baby boy to me and I got to see him. All I could do was stroke his cheek. I only got to have a few minutes with him. He needed more care. I don't know how long it took (I was so loopy and I was in and out of sleep), but at one point Andrew did come back and we went down to Mother & Baby. 

Andrew was gone a lot with our baby and our baby's blood sugar was low. The drug they had given me so slow my contractions when I was in labor, a common side effect is that is causes a low blood sugar so they spent hours trying to get it back up. Finally I was able to see him and hold him. 

When we first checked into the hospital, my first nurse told me when you have your baby there is an instant love and connection that cannot be described. It's stronger than being pregnant, that love magnifies and you can only understand it by experiencing it. Andrew and I both feel we didn't get that experience. Everything was so rushed and hectic, I don't think we were fully able to comprehend everything. I was loopy and Andrew later told me he was so worried about me. He was trying to balance being there for our baby and being there for me while we were in different parts of the hospital. But once things slowed down and I was able to hold our baby boy, that is where I felt that strong connection. I couldn't believe he was mine. This was the one that I felt kicking me at all hours of the day.

This is the one that I could see moving inside me (one of my favorite things about being pregnant). Now he was here, and I was holding him. 

We stayed an additional 4 days in the hospital for my C-section. Those days are so special to me because it was only the 3 of us and we got to spend so much time together. And with the hospital staff I got some much needed rest. Andrew would leave occasionally to go up to our new house with his parents to help make it livable which was a big help. At the end of the 4 days I was ready to go. I hadn't been outside for days and I was ready to be home and start this new stage of our life. 

We came home Saturday and we all spend our first night in our new home together. 

A C-section was the last thing I wanted, but I don't think there was anything else that we could have done differently to prevent it. My body was ready to go into labor, it just needed a little help. If we went earlier or later to the hospital, I think his head would have been the same position. The thing I wanted the most was a healthy baby regardless of how he got here. He is the most perfect thing and I am so grateful to have him here with us. 

Hudson Andrew Earl 
7 pounds, 12 ounces and 20 inches long

Mr. & Mrs. Clifton

Back in March my brother got married to Maquilla in the Provo City Center Temple. 
So crazy to think that my little brother is married! It was such a perfect day even if it was a bit chilly. 

Blake works at a vacuum repair shop in Logan, UT and for a brief period of time, Maquilla did too. 
After she quit, the reconnected and started dating, and now they are married!

It was so much fun to celebrate their day. 

BOY oh BOY!

 We had our 20 week ultrasound appointment earlier this week and we were able to find out that Baby Earl is a BOY! 

When Andrew and I found out, I don't think we were too surprised. I had a feeling that we were having boy from
the very beginning and I think that rubbed off on Andrew. haha. I think he is just overjoyed to have someone to
play basketball with! 

We had our ultrasound and our technician was SO good! I mean, how many ultrasounds does she do a day? But she
gushed over everything like it was her first time seeing it as well.  She also did an great job explaining everything and it
was amazing to see just how much our baby is growing! On our last ultrasound when I was 9 weeks, baby was just a
little ball. Now, he looked like a actual baby! Hands, feet, his brain divided into two hemispheres, we were even able
to see all 4 chambers of the heart and see the heart actually pumping! And the heart is only about the size of a fingernail!
So tiny, but already so developed. When we saw everything that there was to see, our technician asked us if there was anything
we would like to see again and we took a couple more minutes. 

It was pretty neat to see baby moving around and thinking that it was happening inside of me.
Sometimes I was able to feel the movement and see it at the same time! Neatest thing ever! Our technician also
said that we got some really good pictures because our baby was all sprawled out. She said that often they are curled
up into a ball or doing summersaults. 

We did do a little gender reveal gathering (not party, because Covid), with our family and one of our couple friends
who was in town for the holidays. It was a lot of fun to announce the gender in a fun way vs. just telling them. 
Andrew and I found out the gender in the ultrasound room. Andrew really wanted to find out together before 
everyone else and I wanted to find out with everyone but I finally agreed to find out with him. I really don't think
there's any right or wrong way to do it, but someday I want to be surprised with the group ;) 

It was so fun to do a gender reveal though! We all gathered outside so it was a little cold but it was fun to see everyone
find out as the smoke started to reveal we were having a boy! My mom started crying which I was NOT expecting
but I guess I should not have been surprised. 

^And we were rebels, directions said not to hold in our hands, but we did it anyways^

Today we went shopping for baby boy and Andrew and I had so much fun! Though we are both over the moon
with our baby, I think Andrew has me beat with how excited he is! We bought some outfits and we love to imagine
our baby one day wearing them. We have bought so many things for baby already but today was the first time
buying things specifically for our baby BOY! 

In other pregnancy news:

I don't have any bump pictures because while there is definitely some extra growth there, I just feel fat. None of my
clothes fit (Christmas break has been SO nice because I've just wearing leggings, joggers, and sweatshirts
the entire time) so I need to go on a little shopping trip. 

No big pregnancy symptoms except that I am constantly achy. Thank goodness Andrew is such a wonderful
human being and rubs my back. Over Christmas I think he did it for an hour and and a half straight! But I'll take
the body aches over being nauseous any day! 2nd trimester I can actually function and be more active! 

Baby is very active. It's hard to describe. I started to feel him sometime between Thanksgiving and Christmas
but I wasn't sure if it was just my body or baby. The best way I can describe it as is a poking feeling but in a
wavelike way. I have no idea if that makes any sense, but it's so weird. 

We are ending 2020 with the happiest way we can imagine and we are anxiously waiting for May when we can
meet our sweet little baby! 

We're Going to Have a Baby!

The news is out!

We are going to have our first little baby

and we could not be more excited!

After four years of marriage, Andrew and I felt it was time we should add a baby to our family.

I was always told, "you'll know when the time is right."

We never had this inspiring moment where we KNEW it was time but we just felt, "What next?"

I finished with my Bachelors in December and Andrew finished his Masters in August. We traveled a lot and felt we had checked everything off in the newlywed stage.

and for a few months we just felt like we were bobbing around in the ocean.  We felt like it was time to start moving forward and we felt we could do that by adding to our family. 

Andrew and I started trying a few months ago, hoping I would get pregnant quickly, but also knowing the reality that it could take at least a few months or years.

Sooooo, I was super surprised to find out that we were pregnant on our FIRST try!

(more about me finding out I was pregnant later.) 

I have been sooo lucky with symptoms.

I've been feeling pretty nauseous throughout the past few weeks, but I've only thrown up ~6 times.

The first time Andrew was making something with garlic and I could not handle the smell. I went to brush my teeth and with the combination of the smell and making it harder to breath when brushing my teeth, I could not take it, and that was that.

The following times have all been brushing my teeth. For some reason having something in my mouth makes my nausea worse and it doesn't always end well. And once I threw up water because my stomach was being annoying. Besides that, I've been doing really well in the nausea department. 

I've also been tired ALL the time (which is now tons better now 1st trimester is over). Those first 3 months were:

work, nap, small dinner, sleep, and repeat.

Andrew and I had a pretty exciting life going on.

At 9 weeks, we had our first ultrasound and Andrew and I got to see our little babe and hear little baby Earl's heartbeat. I was so grateful Andrew was able to be there and experience it with me and covid didn't ruin that part of our excitement! 

We are already so in love with our little babe and can't wait to meet face to face.

It doesn't seem too real yet... sometimes I wonder if I'm just making it up in my mind. But I'm sure it will get more real when my belly becomes bigger. 

 

Tomorrow I will share a fun video of how I told Andrew. We are so happy that this secret it OUT! Keeping it was the worst. 15 weeks along and this little baby already has our hearts! We love you little baby Earl and are so thankful to have you.

He MASTERED it!

Andrew graduated with his Masters and I could not be more proud of him! 

Obviously there was no graduation ceremony... but this was still a pretty special moment.

This guy amazes me!

For 2 years he worked full time and went to school part time.

Every night he would go to bed around 2:00 or 3:00 getting everything done.

And he still managed to do things around our house while I was going to school. 

One thing that I noticed about Andrew when we were dating is how hard working he is!

He puts 110% into everything he does and he always is willing to help and do more than is share.

And with his schooling, there was no exception. 

If there is such a thing as superman, Andrew checks everything off the list. 

Dear handsome husband of mine.

I am SO proud of you!

I don't think I can ever say that enough.

and hey!

no more homework! ever! 

Congrats! You are one incredible hard working human! 

The Tassel was Worth the Hassle!

Where do I even begin? I can't start with "I finished my bachelors," because I technically finished in December. 

And I can't say, "I walked for graduation," because that was cancelled due to Covid. But I guess I can say I have 

the pictures to prove I have my bachelors degree! 

There was no fanfare, no switching the tassel to the left side, no singing the Scottsman, and no walk 

across the stage with my name being called and being handed my diploma cover. But I did it! 

There have been so many miracles that have led me to where I am. When I applied for college back in high school 

I applied as a nursing major and that quickly changed when I took anatomy. 

Interesting, but not good on my eyes. haha. 

I then thought about an elementary school teacher because that was something I had always had an interest in 

but I still wasn't 100% on board with that career decision. I was talking about career choices with a friend and 

she suggested special education to me. I immediately turned down the idea because it never even crossed my

 mind because it was something I never had any interest in. 

Somehow this friend and I ended up taking an institute class (religion class for young adults during the week) 

with adults with special needs. From day one I loved it and soon after that I found myself switching majors to 

special education. A few weeks after I changed me major, I got a powerful understanding from God that I 

made the right choice. 

For the rest of my freshman year and my sophomore year of college, I took all the prerequisites I needed before 

leaving on my mission. When I came back from my mission the special education department added one 

additional math class that I needed to take before I could apply to the program. Since I had not taken a math class 

in over a year I needed to take an additional math class before the one I actually needed. 

This is where my college journey got really complicated 

but also where the miracles started to come one after another. 

For some reason I can't fully remember, I was not able to take the Math 1050 at Utah State, but I really needed 

that ONE class! Andrew and I were married and I moved down to Provo. Thankfully I had applied to BYU earlier 

that year and was able to take the equivalent math class there for the summer semester (which turns out is a lot

 harder than the USU one). 

I'm going to be honest, I did not do too well in that class. But apparently many people were in the same boat as I was. 

Our professor said that if 20 things could go wrong in a semester, all 20 things went wrong that semester. If I 

did not pass the math class it would have added another year to my major because the special education 

department only accepted applications at the beginning of fall semester. 

By some miracle, I got the EXACT grade I needed to apply for my major! 

Andrew and I were going to move up to Logan for me to finish school, but that didn't pan out the way we had planned. 

We looked at BYU and UVU (local universities in the Provo area) for my special education degree. BYU had 

my graduation date a year later and had a lot more hoops to jump through and UVU did not have my emphasis. 

Those options were out. 

At the last minute, Andrew found that Utah State had a distance campus in the Provo area. At the time they only 

offered classes for the special education degree every 2 years and 2016 was one of the years! 

How in the world does this happen? Another miracle! 

As I was applying to the special education program I had everything I needed except two things. 

#1 My math ACT score was 1 point lower than the requirement. I needed to take that part over again. I was getting 

my appointment set up to take the test and Utah State contacted me saying since it was just one point and I 

have had such good grades for the past 3 years of school, they would waive it and would accept my original ACT 

math score. (Are you keeping track of the miracles?)

#2 I had not taken the Praxis test, but they said if I signed up to take it and passed all 4 sections before student teaching

 they would let me in. (Thank you and add that to the miracle list.) 

I was accepted into the program and I got a job working at a school in a special education classroom which was 

the perfect way to gain experience in my field. After work I went to class twice a week, often from 4:30-10:30. 

I took the Praxis and passed the language arts and history sections. Which were the two sections I had actually 

studied for. I only needed to pass the math and science sections and then I would be good! The Praxis test stressed 

me out and I avoided it for 3 years (not my best idea). It was Summer 2019 and there was no way I could avoid 

it anymore because student teaching was in the fall. I literally signed up on the very last dates I could and studied 

my brain out with many, many tears. 

I went in to take the first test (science) and I look at the first problem, and it was not even close to the types of 

questions I had been studying. And I was studying from Praxis handbook! I did the best I could and really, I 

just guessed. The next day I took the math section. Same deal. Nothing was even close to the problems I had studied. 

I hadn't even seen most of this stuff in college and this was an elementary education test! Some of the problems I 

couldn't even guess on because it was fill in the blank and I just left it blank. 

Once again, miracles happened. I passed BOTH the science and the math sections with at least 10 points above 

the score I needed! Even though it was my procrastination and stress that led to a last minute attempt, miracles still came.  

I finished my student teaching in December and I was able to get a full time job in the middle of the school year! 

Mountains seemed to have literally been moved me during my college experience. 

I know God guided me to my career and I know that He helped me every single step of the way! 

Special education has a special place in my heart. 

It's been amazing to see how God has led me to where I need to be. 

And last little miracle. Andrew and I went up to Logan to take pictures on the Utah State campus in my grad gear 

at the beginning of August. When I was getting dressed in the morning we realized that we left the cap and tassel at 

home (and that's a two hour drive away). Thankfully my mother-in-law had brought a spare graduation cap they 

had but nothing could be done about the tassel. I don't know how other universities do it, but Utah State has 

different colored tassels depending on your major and there are 9 different colored tassels total!

Andrew said to just go up to campus and make the best of it and we could possibly come back later with the 

tassel and take more pictures on a different weekend. This is the amazing part. Graduation pictures are not a 

thing because graduation day has already happened for spring semester and it's a little early for summer semester 

graduates. There were two girls walking and Andrew saw they had the exact colored tassel I needed. They only had 

a hat and tassel, nothing else. We asked if we could borrow the tassel and they said yes! I know how silly that 

sounds, but it was something that mattered to me. We were able to get the pictures I needed and they waited for us. 

No one was taking graduation pictures, and the one person that was, had the light blue tassel I needed.

Talk about God taking care of even the small things. 

And just to brag about my university, it was ranked 29th in the nation in education!

 I feel like that's pretty good standing when we're talking about the entire country! 

I never thought I would do special education. When I was in high school I signed up for an elementary 

school class where I would go to a local elementary school and work for a class period in the classroom. 

I somehow got placed in a special education classroom and the teacher told me to never go into special education 

because of how much paper work there is. I told her "Not a problem! It's not something I want to do." 

But Heavenly Father knows me better than I know myself. When I was young my favorite song in 

church was, "I'll Walk with You." I would pick that song anytime I was chosen on to choose the song 

to sing. Here are the lyrics for those who might not be familiar with the song.

"If you don’t walk as most people do,

Some people walk away from you,

But I won’t! I won’t!

If you don’t talk as most people do,

Some people talk and laugh at you,

But I won’t! I won’t!

I’ll walk with you. I’ll talk with you.

That’s how I’ll show my love for you.

Jesus walked away from none.

He gave his love to ev’ryone.

So I will! I will!

Jesus blessed all he could see,

Then turned and said, “Come, follow me.”

And I will! I will!

I will! I will!

I’ll walk with you. I’ll talk with you.

That’s how I’ll show my love for you."

I guess it has always been in the plan for my life. I just didn't realize it.